Aug 29, 2011

Bride of Unstable Molecules

So far on Unstable Molecules, we've covered "civilian" clothing only - stuff people wear when they're not off fighting Galactus or whatever.  That's because it's hard to decide what a ridiculous superhero costume is: all superhero costumes are ridiculous.  Outside of a comics convention or Halloween, you're never going to see anyone dressed like Spider-Man wandering the streets - but nobody would ever put Spider-Man's costume on a "worst costumes" list, because it is a great superhero costume.

(And even some costumes that are ridiculous, like Captain Ultra's amazing Technicolor dreamcoat, are supposed to be that way.  So to qualify as an Unstable Molecules candidate, someone has to inadvertently dress funny.)

But anyway.  Sometimes, a character has a costume that's so ridiculous that it stands out, even in the context of superhero comics.  One such character is Medea.

Nice attention to detail with those hanging pockets.
(art by Steven Butler and Randy Emberlin)

Medea is a member of the Host, a team of villains who hang around with Judas Traveller, a Clone Saga-era Spider-Man villain who at first seemed to be a god-like immortal, but who later turned out to be an even-more-poorly-dressed Mysterio. And believe me, Medea comes by her fashion sense honestly - Traveller himself is a definite candidate for a future Unstable Molecules installment. But today, we're looking at this Madonna-meets-mercenary monstrosity, who first appeared in Web of Spider-Man #117, part one of the Clone-Saga kick-off storyline Power and Responsibility.  Let's break it down:

  • Ridiculous '80s hair.
  • Costume jewelry.
  • One fingerless glove, one regular glove.
  • One of those '80s women's sweatshirts that went over one shoulder, but apparently stretched so much it goes under one breast...which must mean that either she's wearing an elbow warmer, or she can't move her right arm.
  • Tights - a bathing suit-type thing with a plunging - nay, spelunking - neckline.  Also, it apparently has separate spandex sleeve-pieces, because there's no way that thing has sleeves attached to it.
  • Denim cutoffs, possibly stolen from Tobias F√ľnke.
  • Torn fishnets.
  • Army boots.

But wait!  When Medea appeared in the third part of Power and Responsibility, in Spider-Man #51, artist Tom Lyle apparently decided that what Medea's costume needed was more stuff.

"Maybe we could find him faster if he couldn't hear you jingling from three miles away, Medea."
(written by Howard Mackie, art by Tom Lyle and Scott Hanna)
Note that both gloves apparently now have fingers, but we've added more jewelry (including a nose stud), a belt with pouches, a giant laser gun, and a tattered cape.  The '90s, ladies and gentlemen.

(Seriously, though, what is with the Daisy Dukes?  Was that a thing in the '90s?)

1 comment:

  1. I'm pretty sure the outfit in that first picture makes her either an extra from a hair-metal video or a hooker.